Mrynit

From Hak5

Mrynit is a college student who hopes to get a degree in Electrical and Computer Engineering. He has been watching hak.5 ever sincs 01x04 or so. he has plans to make his own IPTV show. it is basically a vlog about the classes he takes at college. as of now nothing is being done for he show. He knows very little about Linux.

[edit] The Truth

The above is just what he tells people so that he can lead his double life as an officer of the CIA. He has told me this personally and I have confirmed all of the following to be true.

He was recruited during the Korean War, when Saddham, in conjunction with the zombified Stalin used Kuwaiti ninja forces, working under the orders of the killer alien UFO people, invaded South Korea in order to kill all of the 1337 Korean Warcraft clans who were beating Saddham during RTS matches.

Unable to handle the combined, UFO/zombie/Crazy-Arab menace, the United States and its allies decided to enlist the help of Mrynit. Not only the hardest man known at the time, but also the hardest thing at all in the known universe. With nothing more than a slingshot, 2 rocks and a box of waterproof matches Mrynit was able to single-handedly destroy the combined evil menace that was endangering RTS gaming and the civilized world.

Realising that they may need Mrynit again, they put him in carbon freezing and saved him for when humanity was once again endangered.

[edit] The Resurrection

Mrynit was not brought back because humanity again needed saving from imminent danger, but for much more important reasons. While he was an incredibly strong and amazing warier, he was also incredibly good looking and while never documented officially, he was incredibly capable of satisfying women sexually, in ways that simply no other men could. This was kept secret because if it were revealed to the world, woman from all over the world would go crazy with lust and the fabric of civilization would simply collapse.

One day a sexually energised, 22yo female brunette scientist, who upon seeing Mrynit in the carbon freezing chamber was simply overwhelmed with uncontrollable animalistic lust, freed him for captivity and took him to stay with her, with no purpose but to simply please her sexually. While she was a sexual goddess that men only dream of ever seeing, Mrynit, the great Adonis that he is, could not be contained to simply one woman. He spends much of his time satisfying the few women that are able to meet his standards. These include the worlds most attractive models/actresses/performing artists and other women that may be considered worthy of his time and pleasures